Today, I am at the breakfast table with my daughter, her family and some of her friends. A conversation took place between one of the mothers and her daughter blaming her for some behavior.
A conversation ran in my mind, which I decided to open with the young people around me, about the meaning of blame and the difference between it and admonition.
Is there a difference in the English translation of the two words.
Or that the Arabic language has capabilities superior to English in expression.
My goal was to pass on my experience to them without interfering.
What is the difference between blame and admonition?
Judgment contains innocence, love and positive energy
As for blaming, its goal is to prove the other’s mistake and earn a point on it.
Judgment when you hear the feeling of love,
Blaming what you hear keeps the other in a state of self-defense, which is a negative feeling.
The difference between them in saying is the way you say it and your comment on the response
In blaming, you continue to prove the error of the other after answering him, and the blame deepens
As for the reproach of loved ones, any response opens
Baba to accept and build on the offer.
My educated friend said to me when I discussed her blaming and admonishing:
You have the right, for admonition is the words of the lover gently, from the door: “You are reprimanded until you are satisfied.”
As for blaming, it is slandering with abusive words with the intent of punishment, and it is a degree of administrative punishment preceded by attention and followed by the opponent. It involves and is associated with the infinitive letters of the word meanness.
What is beyond reproach from blame.
She added:
The blame comes from the same source as the blame and in popular culture:
“Words of admonition are prolonged between loved ones.” This is because they are greeted at the threshold of the house with joy and happiness, with hugs and kisses, and asking about news and conditions. And they bid farewell to recommendations for return and prayers for safety and hugs and farewell tears for the near separation.
As it is said: “Sixes are custodians” when provision comes with the bride.
and “blame for looking” for a gentle apology for an inadvertent disregard.
And “the threshold of gazaz” denotes luxury and ease of joyful living.
and “tata…tata…
Step the Threshold” for the child’s first steps on the ground in the direction of exit to life.
And of course, the “green threshold” where happy gathering, abundant goods at low prices, sectoral market movement, and profitable wholesale on holidays and occasions.
And “No reproach on the threshold.” Where it is not correct to receive guests or bid farewell to them. And “the waiter’s reproach is to be avoided”, that is, to ignore it, because it does not deserve the effort or the emotion of admonishing
And another friend of mine sent me a research paper by Dr. Fouad Hadiya (Professor of Psychology at Ain Shams University) in which she says:
“Blame is an indirect way in which a person asserts control over the person he blames and appoints himself as his judge and judge. This is not accepted by many.”
And Christ warned and taught, “Do not judge, that you may not be judged.”
Scientific research has proven that the person who is always being blamed, when he tries to change, does not change for the sake of those he loves, but rather changes to prove that he is not a bad person.
Sometimes we blame our children, our husbands, our destiny, and many times we blame God Himself for objecting to certain things we are going through.
Dr. Fouadah also says, “Attitude is a sophisticated language that leads the locomotive of love forward, igniting it with the fuel of self-confidence and purifying it from a sense of failure.”
But blame!!!
When we blame our children, we generate a feeling of inferiority and a loss of self-confidence. Perhaps some of us suffered from parents blaming him in his childhood, so I think that admonition or encouragement and warning is the fruitful language that stimulates and does not destroy like blame.
Let us pay attention to how we use words with others, because “death and life are in the hand of the tongue,” as the wise Solomon says, with our words we may kill or revive those we speak with. There is a saying that says: The wound of the sword heals, while the wound of speech never heals…
Let our words always be accompanied by grace, and let us change the language of blame and condemnation with the language of love and encouragement.
blame and don’t blame